When I hoped I feared
—
Since I hoped I dared
Everywhere alone
As a Church remain —
Spectre cannot harm —
Serpent cannot charm —
He deposes Doom
Who hath suffered him —
Since I hoped I dared
Everywhere alone
As a Church remain —
Spectre cannot harm —
Serpent cannot charm —
He deposes Doom
Who hath suffered him —
F594
(1863) J1181
The conclusion of this
concise little poem, an epigrammatic couplet, seems to say that the only way to
dispel ruin or anguish is through enduring it: "He deposes Doom / Who hath
suffered him". While the last line
is ambiguous enough to permit another meaning – to have "suffered"
Doom might also mean to have accepted it – I believe the poem as a whole supports
the idea of endurance.
The journey to this epigram begins in hope and travels through
loneliness – perhaps the loneliness of a failed attempt at love, or perhaps the
loneliness of a life chosen to be lived in much solitude. The poem begins with
two parallel lines. The first is chronological: When the speaker felt hope she
also felt fear. That makes sense: something hoped for is not yet attained and
so we fear our hopes will be dashed. The second line is causative: because the
speaker hoped she dared to act. This also makes sense: why take risks if there
is no hope of success?
The central four lines are difficult. The aloneness seems to have
resulted from the dared action rather than as an underlying state of being.
Then Dickinson introduces images from Christianity. She is "Everywhere
alone" as if her interior were some empty and abandoned church. We expect
a church to be filled with life – either of its worshippers or of the divine
spirit. But in this poem to this speaker it is a symbol of vacancy.
Immediately following the reference to the Church is the "Spectre".
In addition to suggesting some frightful phantom, it might harmonically suggest
the Holy Ghost as well. The Serpent, another Biblical reference, follows the
spectre. The serpent persuaded Eve to taste the forbidden fruit and thus lose
Paradise. But in the lonely, churchish vantage from which the speaker writes,
neither spectre nor serpent can harm her or lead her astray. Such a vantage
would be one where there is no hope from whispered temptations, nothing left to
fear from spectres holy or unholy. It is a safe but barren and lonely place.
Yet she has not succumbed. Doom has no sovreignty over her. She has
experienced some agony or ruin and emerged in some state of static peace.
This epigrammatic end seems to me a reworking of a poem written two
years earlier: "'Tis so appalling – it exhilarates –" [F342]
where Dickinson writes, " To know
the worst, leaves no dread more — ". She also, chillingly, writes that although "any
[who] are not sure" about Truth may be shown prayer, "we, who know, /
Stop hoping, now –". Perhaps that is Dickinson's poetic center: Neither
hope nor despair, but a forging on, fearless now, plumbing the depths.
Thank you for this excellent analysis of a difficult poem.
ReplyDeleteI read the word "suffered" as acceptance. The poem begins with conflict -- a waffling back and forth between hope and fear. We often view hope as a positive experience and fear as a negative experience -- but as long as either is in effect, we are subject to the vagaries of fate (doom is the Old English word for fate) -- and fate is empowered.
The loneliness is a spiritual experience. The poet finds her church everywhere -- in Nature. But it is an isolated experience, divorced from others. Loneliness is empowering because it allows detachment -- free from harm (fear) and charm (hope). And that "deposes Doom" -- liberates the poet from fate.
The word suffered is interesting because it has two meanings -- I expect ED intended both meanings to resonate. If we are caught in and struggle with hope and fear -- there is no more clear example of suffering (with the sense of endurance of pain) and fate is our master. But if we are detached and free from hope and fear, then suffering adopts a meaning of acceptance.
I like your thoughtful reading of the poem, particularly the linking of loneliness and empowerment. I think that's just right.
DeleteAha! The definition of doom as fate must be what Emily meant in her letter to Helen Hunt Jackson wishing her "Dooms of Balms". A meaning that escaped Mrs. Jackson at the time.
DeleteThat's right -- "Dooms of Balms" on Hunt's wedding. It's a wonderful phrase; very rich.
DeleteI like both the acceptance and the endurance messages here. Once does need to accept in order to endure.
ReplyDeleteOne could also look at the legal definition of depose (ED's dad was a lawyer, and I believe that she was privy to much of the jargon). If you use both definitions together, then he who declares (in writing) doom is able to dispose of it.
ONE does need, not once. Gah - I wish that one could edit comments. :)
DeleteI like it: depose to dispose. I can certainly see Dickinson having that word echo in her mind.
DeleteNice. Such a fluidity is applicable at many points along the spectrum of despair and shattered dreams; as well as hope and will.
ReplyDeleteArguably, she states that she is completely alone as a "Church" on weekdays. Yet, this loneliness gives her the safety she needs, because the worst is no longer a threat when we have experienced it––"Spectre," and "Serpent."
Hope has brought fear, because it means she will have to be alone to continue the solitary pursuit in order to build an eternal poetic space, but she dares, because she knows that once someone has taken that step, they also overcome the fear.
Interesting: loneliness = safety, yet fear and daring. A thoughtful reading, thanks.
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ReplyDeleteGood analysis and I love this blog.I have a different interpretation of the poem. When I hope I feared - it refers to the non assertive nature of the word "to hope" as it is not normally associated with immediate action/results/confidence but rather a long drawn out struggle with no view of a time-bound result. At the same time "When i hoped I dared " -- cause eventhough I dont respond with action I still have hope i.e not accepted the norm so I dare to think different."Everywhere alone, As a church remain" (two lines read as one)-- Im alone in my thoughts/ideas. A loner who has revolutionary ideas but no intent on starting one like an abandoned church- "a preacher with no followers". A spectre cannot harm - the order/norm cannot affect her in loneliness- Serpent cannot charm - the misogynist cannot hurt her in her thoughts(reference to Eve), "He deposes doom, Who hath suffered him" - The only way to survive through an inevitable fate/doom/anguish is through enduring it which is much better than the suffering of inaction and loneliness. My view is that she is convincing/chastising herself for her reclusive nature in the last lines of the poem............ or Im just stretching it!!
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work Susan
All good points. Rather than "chastising herself", however, assuming the rest of your commentary, I wonder if she isn't 'simply' reflecting -- reporting on her inner excavations.
DeleteOne can read Since I hoped I dared two ways, the first, because, the second, as a travel in time. I started reading it as because, but when I took it as development, I dared comes later, after I hoped/feared. Now [i'm] Everywhere alone.
ReplyDeleteIn the poem reading in time and knowledge gained from some confrontation that is only alluded to in the imagery of the Serpent, the poet has matured in order to accept her fate, her fall.
I think that's right: sadder but wiser as Adam and Eve must have been. Once they had gained the knowledge that got them expelled from the Garden, they were less susceptible to Serpent.
DeleteIn an alternate version, the second to last line is "He is the King of Harm..." I can't help but think of Sting's self pity singing "It's my destiny to be the king of pain...." I much prefer "He deposes Doom" although her meanings are, generally speaking, very similar in both versions.
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ReplyDeleteSince I lost Wadsworth, “O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?”
ReplyDelete1 Corinthians 15:55